This is not a mirage. It is an actual post.

Hey peeps. I need to apologize for my absence. I'm going to try my best to be around more often, but I lost my funny for a while - still not sure if it's back - and I didn't want to be Debbie Downer and harsh any melons with my depression. Because that is exactly what it was, and is (and will continue to be), compounded by the news that my beautiful, ornery boy has been diagnosed with Autism.  I'm going to address that journey in another blog, and I will post the link here later if anyone is interested. That will be where I get real - real mad, real sad, real proud, real everything. If you don't want to stop by, because really, it will be a roulette of emotions over there, don't feel obligated. If you want to join me and my family on this Autism adventure, please join me. I would love suggestions and advice. Celebrate successes and reassess what needs to be done differently with us, but do not feel sorry for us. All that has changed in our lives is a line on Q's medical chart, some extra appointments, and some new people in our lives. I am of the school of thought that a diagnosis is not a label, not a box to put my kid in, but a tool to help us help him be the most that he can be. And I can pretty much guarantee that this boy will teach me more than I will ever teach him.

I'm not going to lie and tell you that my heart doesn't hurt. It does. There are moments I feel absolutely broken. And then I look at him. And like the Grinch, my heart grows three sizes. And I remember why I wanted to be a mother so badly. Because every second I get to spend with that boy makes life worth living. Every smile, every frown, every flap, squeak, stomp, and squawk - it's what makes him Quinn. And I wouldn't trade a minute of it. Ever.

Thanks. Oh, and I love you guys.
<3