Monday, April 23, 2012

This is not a mirage. It is an actual post.

Hey peeps. I need to apologize for my absence. I'm going to try my best to be around more often, but I lost my funny for a while - still not sure if it's back - and I didn't want to be Debbie Downer and harsh any melons with my depression. Because that is exactly what it was, and is (and will continue to be), compounded by the news that my beautiful, ornery boy has been diagnosed with Autism.  I'm going to address that journey in another blog, and I will post the link here later if anyone is interested. That will be where I get real - real mad, real sad, real proud, real everything. If you don't want to stop by, because really, it will be a roulette of emotions over there, don't feel obligated. If you want to join me and my family on this Autism adventure, please join me. I would love suggestions and advice. Celebrate successes and reassess what needs to be done differently with us, but do not feel sorry for us. All that has changed in our lives is a line on Q's medical chart, some extra appointments, and some new people in our lives. I am of the school of thought that a diagnosis is not a label, not a box to put my kid in, but a tool to help us help him be the most that he can be. And I can pretty much guarantee that this boy will teach me more than I will ever teach him.

I'm not going to lie and tell you that my heart doesn't hurt. It does. There are moments I feel absolutely broken. And then I look at him. And like the Grinch, my heart grows three sizes. And I remember why I wanted to be a mother so badly. Because every second I get to spend with that boy makes life worth living. Every smile, every frown, every flap, squeak, stomp, and squawk - it's what makes him Quinn. And I wouldn't trade a minute of it. Ever.

Thanks. Oh, and I love you guys.
<3

8 comments:

  1. I love that you won't let this diagnosis be his only definition. There is an autistic boy at our church and his mother sees to it that everything revolves around his autism. I feel so sorry for the kid. he will always be defined by his autism.

    I will be there to read about your journey. Your readers will be here for you.

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    1. Brett, thank you so very much! It means a great deal to me! I hope that boy's mother is able to see past his diagnosis some day.

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  2. Much love to you and your family. I have no doubt that you will be everything Quinn needs. Please know that when you need support or just an escape your friends and family will be ready to provide. ~hugs~

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  3. I am so happy that you finally got the diagnosis so that you don't have to wonder and worry any more. Not that you will stop worrying, because you are a mother, and that's what we do re: our kids, regardless of any medical diagnosis. But now you can name it and move on to making sure he is the best kid he can be with whatever extra support he needs.

    HUGS girl. Thanks for coming back to us. We missed you!

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  4. I'm sorry that things have been rough lately. I so get that. Sending you all much love and light through this adjustment period. You have 100% of my support. xoxo

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    1. Thanks, Johi. I've got a big learning curve ahead of me. Good thing we're out of wine, or I may look in the bottom of a bottle for an answer to the circus going on here this morning! Mmmm...wine. <3

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