So, I'm spending quality time on Facebook this afternoon, and I notice my friend Amber posted this picture of a black jellybean on a paper towel. Now, I usually question my own sanity, not too many others' (well, except the Westboro Baptist Church, but that's a given), so I click on her picture to see what the deal is, because she is a very level-headed chick. Turns out, it was NOT a nasty licorice-flavored jelly belly, oh no! It was a Godzilla-sized TICK that she found on her FLOOR because it was so effing FULL of her cat's BLOOD, it FELL OFF, completely satisfied.
Now, not too many of God's creatures freak me out. I can deal with most spiders, one or two types of snake (provided they are no where near me or are appropriately caged in a Houdini-proof box, and if I had to, I could probably deal with a rat (since daughter has begun begggggggging for one for Christmas - don't worry, it's SO gonna get vetoed). But TICKS? Bloodsucking, nasty-ass critters who have no sole purpose on this planet except to gross me out? FORGET IT. Not only do I not understand their existence, there is something in my psyche that makes me feel like I'm crawling with the damned things the minute I see one, even a picture on the interwebz.
So, excuse me while I go over my dog, kids, and myself with a fine toothed comb, and vacuum everything that will sit still. (Yes, I know the tick was in HER house, not MINE. I can't help it.)
Tell me I'm not alone in this. Please. Lie to me if you have to. It's okay.