Xanax me!

You know, like "beer me"?  Or is it just us rural Kansas kids who say that?

Anyway, the reason for the need for plenty of chill pills on hand is that I'm hosting my second Thanksgiving.  What?  The second time should be a cake walk compared to the first?  Usually, except when you're hosting people you don't know.  AND THEIR PARENTS.

My parents are coming, which is awesome - I miss them so much.  That, and they're bringing a bunch of stuff for dinner, including pastries from our home town bakery (they're so good, I'm salivating just thinking about them), and their truck, so I can finally get all of the shit out of the garage and to the dump so we can actually park our cars inside.  What a novel idea!  Park cars IN the garage!

Soooo... I had the amazing idea earlier this fall to invite Hubs' soldiers who can't/aren't going home for the holiday, for whatever reason.  I figured it would be us, my folks, and the guys, really laid back (i.e., I'm wearing sweats and a t-shirt, I need an expandable waist, duh, there's PIE.), football, beers, leftovers, tryptophan coma, the usual, right?  Oh nooooooooooo... not even close.  One of the guys is bringing his PARENTS.  Let me be clear, I think it's awesome that his parents are so cool to be "hell yeah, bring on the holiday with strangers!  And let us bring the bird and our fryer!"  (I love them already.)  HOWEVER... this totally means that I have to dress semi-appropriately.  Meaning jeans and a t-shirt that doesn't have Perry the Platypus on it.  I'll probably survive.

So today I'm making a last minute dash to Walmart (I hope I don't get stabbed trying to score some olives and cream of mushroom soup) and maniacally cleaning.  Because you know his mom will be wearing white gloves and staring at my ceiling fan that hasn't been cleaned in a year.  I know I'll do all of this cleaning for nothing, but hell, between the scrubbing and the inevitable anxiety attack or three that will happen between now and then, surely that means I'll have burned off enough calories to have several pieces of pie, right?